


Red is the Colour That I Like the Best

by Lauren (notalwaysweak)



Series: Taking Liberties [2]
Category: Red Dwarf
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-01-31
Updated: 2003-01-31
Packaged: 2017-10-05 23:46:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notalwaysweak/pseuds/Lauren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Femmeslash plus het (I've indulged my passion for Kochanski/Rimmer here). The Valentine's Day sequel to 'Krissie Kringle', with more of the same pairings from that, plus a bit of a plot. The title comes from 'The Story' by Shawn Colvin. I couldn't think of anything else.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Red is the Colour That I Like the Best

**Author's Note:**

> Red Dwarf characters belong to Grant Naylor.

The fact that Kochanski was no longer dating Dave Lister, or even Tim the chef, had been of some interest to the ship for a short while. The only problem arose when, two days after the New Year had apparently begun (calendars were so unreliable in the year three million and whatever), Kochanski announced that she was seeing Holly. And Holly was a woman. And the ship's computer. And a hologram.

It was a huge blow to the morale of many of the male crew, and a few of the females as well.

Still, people had resolved their issues. Even when Arnold Rimmer got caught coming out of Kochanski and Holly's quarters -- there had been a hasty shuffling of room assignments, meaning Barbara was now sharing with someone else entirely -- with a dopey grin on his face that left no doubt in anyone's mind as to what he'd been doing in there, he only got beaten up once by a jealous rival.

Life was good for Rimmer, even with a black eye.

Life was good for Kochanski, even with the sad looks Lister kept giving her.

Life was good for Holly, period.

Life was even good for Lister, who, since he'd discovered that being Ace Rimmer's sidekick was absolutely not fun at all (_none_ of the women paid any attention to him when Ace was around, not even the skanky ones), had persuaded Ace to return him to _Red Dwarf_. He'd been back since mid-January, and was doing his old job -- cleaning and complaining - just the same as ever. But life was good for him nonetheless, because at least on the ship there were a couple of women -- _only_ a couple, mind you -- who would look at him as if he was anything other than a dog turd, which was the way all Ace's women had looked at him.

* * *

The holidays were so unevenly spaced, Kochanski thought. Christmas, then six weeks later Valentine's Day, and then six weeks or so until Easter, and then nothing for ages and ages. She'd just finished getting the last of the glitter out of her keyboard from Christmas. It was February tenth, and she had three days to find a Valentine's gift of some description for her girlfriend.

Every time she thought the word _girlfriend_, her mind didn't automatically cross-reference it with _giggly friend to spend coffee breaks with_. Now, her mind cross-referenced it with _Holly_, and if she gave it the chance it would open one of the subfiles labelled _pretty green eyes_, _shiny blonde hair_, or _mindbending sex_. The first two weren't usually a problem, but if she thought the last one while she was working, she occasionally needed to dash into the bathroom for a quick 'toilet break'.

Holly wasn't human, but that didn't bother Kochanski one jot -- she'd never been racist or sexist and saw no reason to start being hologramist either. Holly was as human as she needed to be, and that was all that mattered. Oh, and she was a hard-light hologram, touchable, and maybe _that_ was all that mattered, though of course Kochanski didn't just date people for their bodies, she loved their minds as well...

'You look like you're thinking too hard again,' a familiar voice broke in, and Kochanski swung around, grin lighting up her face as she held out her arms and Holly hugged her. 'What's on your mind?'

'Just thoughts,' Kochanski said. 'Any idea what you want for Valentine's Day yet?'

Holly shrugged. 'I haven't thought about what _I_ want, I've been too busy thinking about what to get for you. What do _you_ want?'

'I have no idea, I've been trying to choose something for you!' The pair giggled and kissed and made half the Drive Room very jealous.

'Well, there are still three shopping days until it's crunch time,' Holly said. 'And I'm not going to kill you if you can't find anything at all.'

'But it's our first Valentine's Day together!' Kochanski protested. 'I've got to get you _something_.'

'You'll think of something,' Holly said airily. 'I've got to get back to work, I was just wondering what you were thinking.' Holly had been assigned a position at one of the many consoles that filled the Drive Room, because although she naturally ran everything anyway, she liked to do some of it hands-on now that she had hands. She kissed Kochanski again and wove her way back into the ratmaze of computers and consoles that extended above, below, and behind the front room where Kochanski worked.

Kochanski sat with her hands above the keyboard for a few moments, thinking, then started keying again. There was a smile on her face, and she looked quite radiant to all who saw her that day.

* * *

Keycarding into their room that night, Kochanski barely got through the door before she collapsed on the bed. Perhaps it had been genuine need, but she suspected Hollister was just being spiteful when he had asked her to work an extra two hours. True, they were navigating a particularly tricky part of space, and she _was_ angling for another promotion, so any time she could get was good, but it had been the lack of forewarning that had irritated her.

Holly was still off doing whatever it was that she did -- sometimes she stayed out all night, choosing to solve problems in person rather than remotely -- but someone was in the small kitchen annexe, and Kochanski could smell and hear something frying.

'Who's there?' she called, dropping her bag onto the table and kicking off her shoes.

'Just me,' Rimmer said, poking his head around the doorway. 'Holly mentioned that Hollister was overworking you, so I thought I'd come over and cook for you.'

Kochanski's heart melted. 'Rimmer, you're a lifesaver.' She joined him in the doorway and kissed him, pinning him lightly against the doorframe with her body. His mouth was soft and warm against hers, and it was just what she needed to come home to after the crap she'd been put through by Hollister. Rimmer stroked her hair, the effect a bit ruined by the oven mitt he was still wearing.

'Go shower. This will be a couple more minutes.'

'What is it?'

'Chicken and almond stir-fry, with lots of vegetables.'

Kochanski's taste buds followed the lead of her heart. 'You're the most adorable man I know, you know that?' She kissed him again and headed for the shower, his soft laughter following her.

Rimmer didn't spend every night with them. He didn't even spend a regular night -- say, every Wednesday -- with them. But he would turn up, sometimes invited, sometimes unexpected, and they would invite him in, and things would get very interesting. It had never been about romance -- it was more about the fact that Holly had been seeing him before Kochanski and didn't really want to stop. But then, Kochanski wasn't objecting to the situation. Rimmer wasn't as bad as his reputation made him out to be, once you got to know him, and she even thought she might be falling a tiny bit in love with him.

And for a guy who'd very rarely had sex, he was _brilliant_ in bed.

Kochanski showered, shampooing her hair, and shaving her legs while the shampoo rinsed out under the hot water to avoid wasting water. There were many wonderful things about having a girlfriend instead of a boyfriend -- for one thing, Holly never forgot to put the soap in the soap saver, instead of leaving it on the bottom of the shower stall to melt away and be wasted.

When she came out, wearing clean satin pyjamas and with a towel wrapped around her hair, the meal was ready. Rimmer had set the table for two, lit one of the huge three-wicked candles Holly had found God knew where, and was waiting to seat her.

'Thanks, Rimmer,' Kochanski said, slipping into the chair and letting him pretend to push it in (they were, after all, bolted to the floor in case of turbulence).

'_Oui, oui, madame_.'

Kochanski giggled, and her heart melted a little more. If he wanted to romance her, then what the hell. Holly wasn't here, but that was her bad luck; Kochanski was sure that Holly had spent time with Rimmer when she, Kochanski, wasn't there, and it wouldn't matter if the situation was reversed.

Rimmer brought the steaming plates out of the kitchen, and there was a long period of silence broken only by Kochanski making _yum_ noises and their cutlery scraping on the plates. Which, Rimmer decided, was a testament to the fact that his cooking skills weren't entirely up shit creek, as Lister often claimed.

When the meal was over, Rimmer pushed his plate away and stared at her for so long that Kochanski began to fidget.

'What?'

'I'm just looking. You know, Lister's rabidly jealous of me.'

Kochanski sniffed. 'He should know better. After all, I've got a girlfriend. If you just happen to drop by occasionally, when we're bored, and we invite you to join us to do... _whatever_, then that's your good fortune. I note he never happens to drop by at just the right time. It's just fate.'

'That and the fact that you wouldn't invite him... you wouldn't invite him, would you?'

'You had to ask.' Kochanski thought for a minute. 'No. He always had to be the boss in bed, believe it or not, and you're happy to give and take what you can. It's the right style for us, and he hasn't got it.'

Rimmer made a face. 'Too much information, Kris.' He picked her plate up, stacked it on his, and disappeared into the kitchen. 'So when will Holly be home?'

'I don't know. Late, I guess. She hasn't called in or anything.' As if on cue, the computer monitor set in the table flared into life. 'Oh, wait, here's a message.' Kochanski pushed the salt and pepper shakers off Holly's forehead and smiled down at the screen. 'Hi, Hol.'

'Hi, Krissie. How're you feeling? I could kill Hollister... did Arn turn up and feed you?'

Kochanski nodded, though the sleeping quarters weren't monitored for visuals and Holly couldn't see her. 'Yeah. Chicken and almond stir-fry. He's spoiling me.'

'He'd better not spoil you too much. I want some left for me.' Holly grinned. 'I won't be home till morning, okay? I'm suddenly running a lecture on porous circuits. I think Hollister's out to get us. But I still love you.'

'Yeah, I love you too.' Kochanski made a kissing noise at the microphone, Holly kissed back, and the screen went black.

'What did she say?' Rimmer said, clanking the dishes in the sink.

'She'll be home in the morning.'

'You mean I have you all to myself?'

Kochanski went red. 'Well... if you want.'

The dishes stopped making noise and Rimmer poked his head around the plastic curtain that was the kitchen door. 'Do you really mean that?'

'Yeah. Why not? Didn't you say Dave was inviting Petersen and that crew around for drinks? You'd never get any sleep at home.'

Rimmer leched at her. 'Am I going to get any here?'

Kochanski smiled. 'I'm sure you'll get _something_.'

* * *

Lying tangled in the sheets forty-five minutes later, Rimmer drowsed with his head on Kochanski's breast. Kochanski played idly with his hair, her mind still comparing the soft unruly curls to her Dave's rough curls and Holly's smooth, stylish trim.

She would never have imagined herself here when she left the Brig, let alone when she'd left her own dimension. The difference between her life now and her life back in her dimension wasn't just the difference made by walking through the linkway. It was as if by walking through the linkway she'd walked into a whole new life, ready-made, just waiting for her to step into it. She hadn't taken over where the old Kochanski had left off, of course -- they were different from one another, and different again from this new her, this her who was sleeping with a woman _and_ a man (sometimes).

Kochanski shifted position, the dull tiredness between her legs flaring briefly into a new warmth, and curled her arm around Rimmer. She still hadn't started using his first name the way Holly did, but it didn't matter -- when they were in bed together, she was either incoherent or crying out to a certain deity that one would think people _wouldn't_ want paying attention during that particular event. And he alternated between calling her 'Kris' or 'Krissie', the way Holly did, or just 'baby', as in the 'Oh baby' whimpers he made when she went down on him and his fingers closed around a handful of her hair.

She wondered if he and Lister ever talked about what she was like in bed.

She wondered if they fought about it. If they fought about her.

She wondered a lot of things, that was the story. She always had. If she'd been a cat instead of a human, she'd've been the cat that curiosity killed. But then, she'd definitely be the one that satisfaction brought back, too.

Rimmer murmured a little in his sleep and she absently stroked his back, still unable to entirely wipe the grin that was on her face. Cheshire cat grin. She was also the cat that got the cream. There was a fading mark on her wrist where Rimmer's tie had been knotted around it. She'd never thought about that side of sex before -- even Lister, who liked to get his own way in bed, hadn't brought up the idea of bondage -- but she had been willing to give it a shot, and lo and behold, it had been extremely... interesting? Exciting, maybe that was a better word.

Thinking about sex, which was one of the nicest ways to fall asleep, Kochanski fell asleep.

* * *

There was someone in the living area. Kochanski wriggled out from under Rimmer's arm -- they'd wound up clinging to each other at some point during the night, though she didn't remember it happening -- and shrugged into her dressing gown - rough white towelling with a red heart over the left breast. She pulled open the curtain that was the wall between the living area and the 'bedroom' and grinned widely when she saw Holly sitting at the table, drinking hologrammatic coffee and reading the paper.

'Morning, love,' Holly said. 'Your kettle's just boiled, and I brought fresh milk and eggs home, if you want scrambled eggs.'

Kochanski's grin grew decidedly chipmunk-cheeked. What kind of life was this, when her lover came home and found her in bed with someone else and not only didn't care, but had also brought her breakfast? It was a _wonderful_ one, that was what it was.

Rimmer was up by the time the eggs were ready, stumbling out bleary-eyed, wearing only his black boxers. Both women leered at him.

'God, I've wandered into a dominatrix compound. Save me.' Rimmer paused as Holly stood up and Kochanski started taking her robe back off. 'On second thoughts, God, cancel that.'

* * *

The eggs were just fine reheated.

* * *

After breakfast -- and eggs -- Kochanski, Holly and Rimmer split up, Rimmer to go and find Lister and explain why he was late for work, Kochanski to go to the Drive Room, and Holly to go to bed, because although nether computers nor holograms needed actual sleep, she enjoyed the novelty of it (she didn't enjoy changing the sheets so much, but put up with it).

The day's work was long and boring, and Kochanski entertained herself by trying to think of ideas for Holly's Valentine's gift. She realised she'd better get something for Rimmer as well, since he was spending so much time with them... and a card for Dave, that would do. She wasn't intending to get anything for Tim, because she hadn't dated him in this reality. She knew Kryten had _pretended_ she had, to wind Lister up, but the only thing she'd seen of Tim was a brief conversation held in the hallway outside the loos at the officers' club. The blonde attached to his side had pretty much precluded any chance of the relationship enjoying a revival in this reality.

Thinking of something for Holly was so much harder than thinking of anything for a male. Dave had always been happy with something simple, like boxer shorts with hearts on them, or socks with hearts on them, or lager cans with hearts on them. But Holly, Kochanski suspected, would be a _little_ trickier to please.

Lingerie was out. She'd bought that for Christmas. It was how the whole relationship had started. Chocolates? Flowers? Kochanski didn't even know what she wanted for herself, let alone what another woman would want.

There was a screechy noise over the PA system, and a mumbled curse before the music started up again. Kochanski smirked -- the Cat still hated his job changing the rock CDs, and made every effort possible to get out of it. Nothing had worked so far, not even singing along with every song for an hour - hardly anybody noticed, and those who did said it was a shame they weren't anywhere with a company he could be signed to.

Captain Hollister just said that he'd better not do it again or he'd be back in the Brig for disturbing the peace, and the Cat stopped.

He'd found a girlfriend, Lorelai someone or other, and wasn't willing to risk losing his sex life over a few CD changes. Besides, Kochanski knew for a fact that they were having sex in the PA booth between CD changes, because Lorelai was a friend of Barbara's new roommate, and they'd gone out for a drink as a group. Lorelai had complained about her back hurting, and that was how Kochanski had accidentally found out both that they were shagging and that the PA booth had a terribly hard floor.

It was amazing, the things you found out when you asked questions you thought were innocent.

Holly passed by Kochanski's station, trailing the fingertips of one hand lightly over Kochanski's back. Even that light touch felt like fire and ice combined. Kochanski remembered a hot day, one when the airconditioning had broken down and all work had stopped while every tech capable went to try and find and fix the problem. She and Holly had spent the day in their quarters with a bucket of ice, most of which had been used in ways unrelated to cooling drinks.

All things considered, she was damn lucky. They were six weeks into the relationship and so far were still at the hot and heavy stage, combined with the pet names stage and the meaningful glances stage, plus a lot of other stages now she came to think of it. Actually, it was stupid. Maybe things weren't as clinically ordered as her best friend Erin had once posited. But then, Erin was a doctor, trained to think in steps and stages. It might explain why she'd never married anyone. But then, the fact that she was undecided about her sexuality might also have been to blame for that.

'Hate this music,' Holly said as she went back the other way, arms full of folders.

'Mmmm,' Kochanski said, keying. She knew some of Holly's likes and dislikes: liked purple, hated pink; liked pizza, hated Indian; liked anything but easy listening. Of course, she didn't know _everything_ yet, but she intended to keep the relationship going long enough to find it all out.

She knew what Holly's name meant. HOLI -- it stood for **H**yper-intelligent **O**nline **LI**feform. She was probably the only person on the ship who knew or cared. Holly had said with a smile that the technicians who'd named her probably wouldn't even remember why she'd been called what she was.

Maybe that was what she could do for Valentine's Day. The ship had to recognise that Holly wasn't just the computer, she was a person -- if a slightly different person to the usual concept of it. Kochanski grinned. Finally, the makings of an idea were beginning to come to her.

* * *

Kochanski stood silently in the doorway. Holly was glaring at her. She was holding the frying pan Kochanski had used to cook the eggs that morning.

'I assume 'I forgot' isn't going to be enough of an excuse,' Kochanski offered lamely.

'Kris, I love you. But I have to run this entire ship, and it's exhausting. Being in this body, I can have physical manifestations of stress, and believe me, they're big when they come. I don't want to scrub your dirty frying pan, remake the bed you had sex in with someone else, or do anything that involves cleaning up after you when you should've done it yourself.'

'I'm sorry,' Kochanski said. 'Really. I was in a hurry by the time we were done this morning, and I forgot.'

Holly sighed. 'Forget about it. Just... _please_, try and remember not to leave the place looking like a tip.'

In one dimension, Kochanski dropped the argument. Unfortunately, in this dimension she was tired and snappy. 'I hardly think an unmade bed and an unwashed frying pan qualifies as a "tip".'

'Kris! It's not just that. When was the last time you vacuumed? And the rest of the breakfast dishes were in the sink as well. I don't even _need_ to eat and I still have to clean it all up.'

'God! Holly! Please, I'll do it in the morning. I've got a late starting shift tomorrow anyway.'

'I've _done_ it,' Holly said frostily. 'I hope you enjoy your nicely made bed alone, because I'm not staying here tonight.' She dropped the clean and shiny frying pan on the floor with a clatter, then marched straight past Kochanski.

'Holly!' Kochanski yelled after her vainly.

The only response she got was, 'And your laundry basket is overflowing!'

Kochanski kicked the frying pan across the room and screamed, 'SHIT!' almost loud enough to crack the ceiling.

* * *

'I just don't know how to make it up to her, Kryte,' Kochanski said disconsolately, sitting on the top of the washing machine with her knees drawn up to her chest. 'I feel like I've ruined everything.'

'Access counselling mode...' Kryten mumbled under his nonexistent breath. 'Well, ma'am, what had you planned for her for Valentine's Day?'

'I had a few ideas, but nothing really concrete.' Kochanski hugged her knees, chin resting on them, and looked mournful.

'You need to apologise, to begin with,' Kryten said, wondering just how the hell a sanitation mechanoid she didn't even _like_ had become top of her 'People To Talk To When I'm Having Problems' list. 'And do something _really_ nice.' So his counselling chip wasn't state-of-the-art, being soldered in place by a skutter who'd stolen it from the robotics lab, but it had been useful in the Brig.

'Something nice. Okay, got it!'

'Really?'

'No.' Kochanski considered kicking him, then remembered he wasn't all that good on sarcasm. 'Come onnn, Kryten, help me here!'

'Why don't you ask Mr. Lister for help? He knows what women like, I don't. Besides, this isn't good for my circuits. They're about to overload.'

Kochanski's foot swung, but she caught herself before it connected. 'Ask Dave? Sure. Fine. Whatever.'

'Excellent, ma'am,' Kryten enthused.

No matter how many years he spent around humans, he was _never_ going to get sarcasm.

Kochanski jumped down from the washing machine and went to find Lister. Even if he didn't think much of her relationship with Holly -- and Rimmer -- he was still going to have more ideas than Captain Bog-Bot.

* * *

Lister stroked his chin where he was going stubbly again and looked at Kochanski quizzically. 'You fought.'

'Mmmm.'

'Did you make out -- I mean up -- yet?'

'Huh-uh.'

'Have you _seen_ her?'

'Huh-uh.'

'Can you _please_ speak in actual English, Kris? I'm tryin' to help you out here, but it's a little hard.'

'Sorry,' Kochanski said. 'It's just hard trying to talk to you when you're naked.'

Lister shook his head at her, keeping the razor well away from his chin as he did so. 'Well, Krissie, you need to learn to knock before you come into my quarters. Especially when I've just had a shower.'

'Wear a towel,' Kochanski mumbled.

Lister started to shave again, wincing occasionally as the combination of the razor and his talking meant a cut. 'All I can say is you need to do something big for Valentine's Day.'

'It's February eleventh,' Kochanski said. 'I can't wait that long.'

'It's the twelfth,' Lister corrected, nodding at the clock, which had just ticked over. 'I have a night shift in half an hour.'

'What's so damn urgent about vending machines that needs to be done in the middle of the night?'

'It's a round-the-clock job, just like anything else on this ship. What're you going to do?'

'I don't know,' Kochanski said. 'Something nice and big, if I follow the advice everyone's given me so far.'

'Get her new handcuffs,' Lister said. Their eyes met in the mirror. 'Yes, Rimmer's told me that much.'

'That cretin,' Kochanski said affectionately. There was a pause. An awkward one. 'Listen, Dave... I never really apologised to you for all this...'

'You're a free woman, Kris.' Their reflected eyes were still locked. 'I gave her the sexual magnetism virus. What happened, happened because it was meant to.' He put the razor down and turned around to take her hands in his. 'Nothing could make me happier than the fact that you're happy being with her, Krissie, and even if Rimmer's part of that happiness, I don't care. Besides... well, it's not like I haven't been looking for anyone else.'

A small kind of break happened inside her at those words, like a part had fallen off her heart. For a crazy second she wanted to grab him and cling to him, jealousy raging through her, and forbid him to see any other woman but her.

It passed, and she squeezed his hands, smiling.

'Thanks, Dave. This means a lot to me. I didn't want to hurt you.'

'I didn't really want to _be_ hurt, either,' Lister said. He let go of her hands and turned back to the mirror, picking his razor back up. 'What you really need to do is make her know that she's your world.'

'How am I supposed to do that?'

'You'll find a way. What does she like?'

'What? Colour? In bed? Food?'

'All of it.' Lister rinsed shaving cream off the razor. 'I don't really want to know - especially not the bed thing -- but if _you_ know, then that's what you should give her.'

'Everything she likes? But...'

'Yeah, I know. Some days you cook for her. Some days you do what she wants in bed. For Valentine's Day, you need to do it all.'

Kochanski nodded, her mind already racing through the options. 'Great.' She planted a smacking kiss on his newly smooth cheek. 'Great, Dave, thanks!' And headed for the door at a run.

'Leaving so soon?'

'This is going to take a _lot_ of organising!'

* * *

Holly came back on the night of the thirteenth, still not speaking to Kochanski. She evidently thought Kochanski was being stubborn about apologising, but nobody could out-stubborn a computer. When Kochanski did speak to her - offering her the bed for the night -- she accepted with a single curt nod, and Kochanski bedded down on the uncomfortable sofa in the living area.

All the better to get to the kitchen first in the morning.

* * *

The alarm on Kochanski's watch started beeping, and Kochanski shut it off hastily, then held her breath, listening for movement from behind the curtain. Nothing. She smiled and got up, dressing in the clothes she'd picked out the night before. The next half an hour was breakfast-making, until seven o'clock and the first favour she'd organised.

Holly, being a hard-light hologram, could eat either normal or hologrammatic food. She usually ate hologrammatic food -- her meals really just a formality so she wasn't left out -- but Kochanski had real food planned for this morning. Holly had a taste for the special omelette Kochanski's mother had taught her to make, and Kochanski gathered eggs, bacon, and a few other special ingredients onto the bench. Out came the fatal frying pan. Butter, sizzling on the heat. She hummed as she worked, keeping one ear open for any movement from the bedroom.

By five to seven, everything was ready except the coffee. Kochanski turned the heat off under the frying pan and found Holly's favourite plate while the kettle boiled. At two to seven, the coffee was ready -- milk and sugar added, just the way Holly liked it. At one to seven, Kochanski had put the food down on the table. And at seven o'clock sharp, as the Cat's voice came over the PA system, Kochanski was opening the curtain between herself and Holly.

'Good morning all you crazy guys and gals out there, and happy Valentine's Day! Today's gonna be an all-day lovefest with requests, so if you've got a tune you want to send your lover over the moon with, direct your plea to the Cat - that's me! Our first dedication of the day is for Holly, our _fan_tastic ship's computer -- Kochanski says she couldn't be cuter! Happy Valentine's Day, Hol, with lots of love from Krissie, here's 'What Would Happen?' by Meredith Brooks!'

Holly blinked her eyes open, saw Kochanski and smiled. 'I assume you're responsible for this?'

'No other,' Kochanski assured her. 'I made you breakfast.'

'Hope you cleaned the frying pan.'

'Breakfast is fresh out of it. I'll do it once we've eaten,' Kochanski said. 'I'm sorry for arguing with you, and for not doing it in the first place.'

'I'm sorry I went on about it too,' Holly said. There was a moment of silence, then Kochanski dropped to her knees beside the bed and the pair made some quite indecent smooching sounds.

'Apology accepted,' they said in unison, then both laughed. Kochanski brought Holly's breakfast to her and they ate together, Holly sitting up in bed, Kochanski on the floor leaning against the bunk. Things were back to perfect, except for one small detail.

'I thought Rimmer would've come over for breakfast,' Holly said, frowning.

'Yeah, me too,' Kochanski said. 'Weird.' She took Holly's plate and her own into the kitchen and made loud washing-up noises. 'Maybe he's at the shops, panicking over a last-minute present for us.'

'Maybe.' Holly listened to the Cat's smooth patter -- he was introducing a song dedicated to Lorelai from himself -- then moved to get out of bed. 'Let me dry up.'

'No, you stay put,' Kochanski's voice came back. 'I'm not finished apologising yet.'

Holly smiled to herself, guessing what was in store. She heard the cupboard open and close as Kochanski put the dishes away, then there was a knock at the door.

'Who's _that_?'

'Maybe Rimmer,' Kochanski said, going to the door. She was glad she hadn't taken her dressing gown off yet, if people were going to bug them.

Lister was outside the door, but Kochanski had trouble seeing him at first -- he was behind a huge, red and purple wrapped gift box, tipped up on a dolly. 'Delivery for Kris and Holly,' his voice came from behind the monstrosity. 'From Rimmer.'

'What the hell is it?' Holly asked, getting out of bed anyway. She was already wearing her robe - she'd been wearing it in bed, which made Kochanski suspicious.

'Don't know,' Lister said, wheeling it in and pushing it off the dolly. 'Valentine, maybe?' He handed a card to Kochanski, who grabbed his off the television and handed it to him with equal solemn ceremony, making them both laugh. 'Have a nice day, ladies.' Kochanski could see him already tearing into the card as the door slid shut behind him.

'What's in the box?' Holly said. 'Let's open it.'

'Just a sec while I open Lister's card,' Kochanski said, subtly locking the door with a elbow to the button as she slit the envelope open. They didn't get much mail -- especially not these days -- but she had a letter opener she'd nicked from Erin's university. 'He just says happy Valentine's day to both of us and says he hopes we enjoy our present from Rimmer.'

'Great,' Holly said, bouncing impatiently on her toes. 'Let's open it, huh?'

Kochanski grinned at her and ran the letter opener carefully under the tape holding the paper down. Her grin grew when she noted the air holes punched in the top of the cardboard box. 'Oooh, it's alive...'

'Oh God,' Holly groaned, giggling at the same time. 'Better get him out of there.'

'You girls are good guessers,' came Rimmer's voice, muffled, from inside the box. 'Let me out! It's hot in here!'

'Sweaty Rimmer,' Kochanski said, raising an eyebrow at Holly. 'Sounds like he might need a shower.'

'Sweaty, hot, semi-naked Rimmer,' Rimmer said. 'Come _on_, Kris...'

'Oh, I'm coming.'

'Ha ha,' said Holly, taking the letter opener away from her girlfriend and slitting into the tape holding the box lid down. Rimmer popped out like a jack-in-the-box, breathing hard and looking very, very yummy, clad in nothing but a purple pair of boxers with red hearts on them and a matching bowtie. Kochanski started giggling helplessly. He had a handful of Styrofoam pellets in his hair.

'I'll teach you to laugh at me, my dear,' Rimmer growled, climbing out of the box, his erection already very evident, jutting against the purple satin.

'Shower?' Kochanski said.

'We didn't all fit last time,' Holly said.

'Or the time before that. Did it stop us?'

'You're right,' Rimmer said. 'Shower.'

Kochanski slipped her robe off. Underneath it, she was wearing a brand new purple satin negligee. 'Better strip him,' she said to Holly, who was too busy staring to move. 'You've got to get naked before you shower.'

'Purple,' Holly said intelligently.

'Yeah, it's your favourite colour, remember?'

A grin spread across Holly's face as she shed her own robe. Underneath it, she was wearing only the brief scraps of red satin that Kochanski had bought her for Christmas.

It was Kochanski's turn to stare.

'Red,' she said finally.

'Yup.'

'Red is the colour that I like the best,' Kochanski added.

Then they both leapt on Rimmer.

After a lot of delicious procrastination, they ended up under the warm water in a tangle of limbs and wet and moaning.

* * *

They'd spent all day together, Kochanski's other favours including getting Lister to cover for Rimmer and Barbara to cover for Kochanski herself. There weren't many people on board who could cover for Holly, but she'd sweet-talked the shift manager and he'd let the hologram-computer off for the day. Plus, the Cat just kept spinning the hits -- all Holly's favourites were played amongst the other requests, including Lister's dedication to Rimmer of 'Someone to Watch Over Me' (which led to some suspicion from the girls, until Rimmer protested he'd had nothing to do with it).

The Cat's DJing shift ended at eleven -- it was the longest workday he'd had yet, but he'd made not so much as one complaint the whole time. It ended with Kochanski's last request, dedicated to the three of them -- John Cale's haunting cover of 'Hallelujah'. The words weren't the most romantic ever, but they all liked the tune.

 

_Baby I've been here before,  
I know this room  
I've walked this floor  
I used to live alone before I knew you_

 

As Rimmer arched upwards into Kochanski, who was straddling his hips, he thought of the meaning of those words to him. Physically, he'd lived with Lister. But as far as love went, he'd been all alone until Kochanski and Holly had taken him in.

As Holly stroked the hair back from Kochanski's forehead, seeing her tongue dart out, beckoning, she felt the full implications of this new reality that was hers. The whole ship had been her domain, but now... now all she needed was right here.

As Kochanski leant forward and kissed Holly, and felt Rimmer hard inside her, she remembered the sense of unfulfilledness she'd always felt with just Lister, with just Tim. She sighed with pleasure.

Rimmer, taking Kochanski slowly, split his concentration in half to pleasure both her and Holly. His tongue darted over Holly's clitoris as she balanced above his face. He could hardly breathe, but that didn't seem to matter. What mattered was that he was here, with them, where he belonged - where they all belonged. Holly tasted good, Kochanski felt good, and anything else was unimportant.

The three of them came in rapid succession, Holly first, then Rimmer, then Kochanski. Their awkward positioning made no difference to the feelings flooding them, and when it was over, they collapsed in a tangle of limbs and love.

 

_I remember when I moved in you  
And the holy dove was moving too  
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah_

 

They spooned up, the three of them only just fitting in the double bunk, with Rimmer in the middle. Though they'd been through a lot that day, Kochanski felt him stirring once more against her thigh as sleep approached, and was muzzily pleased.

'Hol?'

'Mmmm?'

'Love you.'

'Love you too, Krissie.'

'Rimmer?'

'Yes, Kris?'

'Love you.'

Pause.

'I love you too.' And his arm tightened around her.

'Arn?'

'Hol?'

'Love you.'

'Love you too.'

Pause again.

'Rimmer?'

'Krissie?'

'You wanna be our boyfriend?'

'More 'n anything.' Rimmer yawned. 'Love you two, you crazy two.'

And they all smiled in the dark.


End file.
